My 2012 to do wish list

I really tightened my mind while drafting my To do list for 2012 here. I just wanted to stay realistic. I’m letting my mind run wild here.  ‘If wishes had wings they could all make it to heaven and we will all be kings’ said T.I in the song Here ye, hear ye. It is however not bad to close your eyes and imagine…what if I had my way in 2012? Ladies and gentlemen, I have compiled a list of those things that I feel that it would be fascinating if I did them, yet they will not see the light in this new year…

Sell the snobbish mask

Not really a snob. For lack of a better name it is snobbish without the despising part. I never see any reason to talk to strangers more than I currently do. I am usually a very accomplished when it comes to pretending that the world exists around me. I wish I could really stop it but I can’t. I kinda love it. You can picture on your good day you are in a mat to work and this guy in a suit seats next to you with headphones on. You wait for a simple ‘hi there’ and it is not forthcoming. You conclude that the guy is a jerk… Yeah that guy is me. I don’t give a fuck. I will start giving fucks when my XXXXL condoms get delivered from Pandora. But seriously I cannot stand trying to ‘hi’ at you then you return ‘hi’ that sounds like ‘yawn’. I’d rather keep wanking with my ‘hi’.

Have a girlfriend

Yes. This is the subtle subject. Most of my friends have never seen me with a girlfriend. They have never seen even my ex-girlfriends. They are not many. Hell, I went through campus without having one. I should be given an award for that. At least I should be entered in the draw. I am not really prepared to horde anybody in my world, and I do not know what the fuck love is. If ever I stumble from my high egoistic ground and fall in front  of this stunning duchess, I will have accomplished a feat that I haven’t managed in…shit how long has it been?...tentatively 5 years. I know my pals will be very astounded. Probably they will bachelor party to cement the milestone.

Take a holiday to….um, Amsterdam

Everybody needs a holiday, right. Now that my employer never gives breaks during Christmas and new year, I would really love an all expense paid trip to Amsterdam. I would have preferred a better place but because of the tough economic conditions, I settled on the cheap one. In addition to that, I think a distant relative resides there. I would like to go look for him. If I find him, then my accommodation is sorted out…plus other issues I could like to clear in that country, don’t overthink it. *looks away*

Enroll for masters, power to the people

Na Tulenge juu. I should just enroll for masters, then subsequently do a PHD, then another degree probably in the area of engineering or medicine, then masters…o.k, I have finished yapping. The amount of laziness in my bones will not allow me to dream about that. At least not this year. I do not think I have the knack to sit for an exam in the next 12 months. I might not even remember my admission number. But this is just part of my wish list.

Start binging, no beer in heaven

I wonder why this is part of my wish list. Well I’m just speaking my mind. Some wishes will just be wishes. Fact: people who do not take alcohol miss a lot. I want in on the stuff I have been missing all along. But to get there I will have to join kibaki first of all, in cutting down the mugumo tree with a razor blade, then chopping it into timber and transporting it to North Pole. If ever by any chance I enter that happy club, I am sure my friends will hold another bash. This time the swimming pool will be filled with alcohol. 

Get a tattoo

            Just like alcohol, this is another thing I really fancy. It would be nice to have a ‘natb’ tattooed in the lower part of my bicep, just like that of Katie Perry. And when I get older with my own business I will have one on my neck. It’s not gonna happen. Why? You know, this stupid moral brick wall in me will never allow me. Get it? I know, I do not totally get it too. But how about this… get really drunk and have my girlfriend’s name tattoed on my balls while in Amsterdam. I will have fulfilled 4 wishes at a go.

Well, I have this feeling that I will do one of the items listed above. When that happens, I will definitely write a post about it, or not. Happy and prosperous new year folks.

Boom box playlist:

Shake it out – Florence and the Machine